What are the psychological changes parents go through when a newborn arrives into the family? We do know that parents’ schedule change drastically when a newborn arrives, and the priority shifts from self to the baby. However, let us dig deeper into the complexity of the brain and some of the psychological changes parents face during this important phase.
In a study by the Yale School of Medicine, researchers went to homes of the new parents and found out that there are two main areas of the brain that are more active in new parents. The first area, “emotion-processing network”, involves the following changes:
- The Amygdala: This is complex structure located in the middle of the brain and deals with the emotions or memories of fear. This will make us more vigilant and focus more on the safety aspect of the baby.
- The oxytocin-producing hypothalamus: This hormone is released into the bloodstream and the amount is excelled as it makes us bond with our newborn. It is often referred to as “the love hormone”.
- The dopamine system: This is often called the “feel-good hormone” which is released so it keeps us in the parenting mood so we can keep on going as parents.
The second area that is more sensitive in new parents, especially in mothers, is referred to as “mentalizing network”. This change helps parents focus their attention on the baby, and let them enjoy each moment with the new baby. In addition, this network enables parents to:
- It raises the ability to let parents “feel into” what the baby may need.
- It also lets areas of the brain have more cognitive empathy for the new baby.
- It also helps parents “read” non-verbal signs, infer what the baby needs, or feels.
- It also may help parents plan what the newborn may need in the future.
Studies also show that the more the father is involved in raising the baby such as feeding, caring, and playing, their mentalizing network becomes more active and has a higher mount of oxytocin released in their bloodstreams.
Another surprising psychological changes parents go through, especially for mothers, are the fact that both their stress and memory levels are toned down few months before giving birth. Studies show that the reason for this is may be the fact that mothers themselves are getting ready for the big day: giving birth.
Deeper meaning of life: Parents find that their reasons of trying to make more money has more meaning to them than before. Now, they are saving money for their baby’s future, and this makes them reflect and appreciate the meaning of life more than ever.
Your psychological bond with your partner: Your thoughts, communication styles, who is doing what for the baby will all be tested. It will take some time to work things out, but it will be tough at first. However, with the right temperament, time, and negotiation, everything will work out fine. After all, everything the parents do, is for the newborn.
Time for yourself: One of the most important aspects for all new parents to do is to have some time for yourself. Sometimes, you just need time to unwind and have a stress-free moment. Taking care of a baby is hard enough, but when you have sometime for yourself, you are letting your internal “battery” recharge. Negotiate with your partner and arrange a time for yourself so that you both can enjoy each other more. Remember, you have to first take care of yourself, so that you can take care of each other, and the baby.
In the words of Joyce Meyer (American Charismatic Christian author), “I believe that the greatest gift you can give your family and the world is a healthy you”.
Text:
greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/ten_changes_new_parents_face
Pic:
psmag.com/social-justice/what-makes-a-healthy-family-62213
